Being an emotional slut.

I think sometimes as women if we are not careful we can become emotional sluts. Clinging to the emotional aspect of being with a man or simply connecting. It's almost like it becomes some sort of addiction. I can only speak for myself when I say I long for connection in a relationship.  I desire this more than sex for me sex without connection is worthless, pointless and holds no substance at all. I can't be with someone I do not feel emotionally connected to. Being married taught me this, being married taught me a lot about myself.  I never really knew just how important emotional connection was to me until I was married. Marriage has changed me sometimes I think for better other times I think for worse.

Nothing against GOD and his idea for marriage but there are times I do not care for marriage I don't even like marriage and I believe that's because I settled in my marriage and I rushed things too much I did not WAIT on GOD like I should have. I find that when that emotional connection is missing I long for it else where or I feel that I need to get it somewhere else if I am not getting it where I am.. I picked up a lot of bad habits our of being hurt and neglected. I got too comfortable in my bad habits. Talk about issues I got issues why I NEED JESUS and will forever be humbled by that fact. Now back to this emotional slut business it's something complex in some sense then not really. Think of it more so as your emotional legs vs your physical legs. this can be just as dangerous sometimes if not worse.    Emotional connections are deeper than just sex and they can take longer to break away from. Emotional pain can cut deeper than physical pain. You feel so close in ways you never thought you could. You share a lot with this person you tell them a lot. You can talk text them for hours on end our always thinking of them next thing you know you want to see them spend time with them. Then things can easily turn physical which can make matters worse. Especially if this person is not your spouse or someone you are engaged to even then you need to be careful. Because as Christian women we should be waiting until marriage for sex no if's and's or buts about it. I often wonder about just how much of a need this is for me. I believe it's a very great need. I need to be close to you in more ways than just sex. Sex isn't everything and as far as I am concerned it's just too over rated these days.

It's not a bad thing because God made it, it's just too over rated to me at times. There are other things just as important if not more important in relationships than sex. There must be conversation, communication, talking, conversing, having non sexual intimate moments together quality time and lots and lots of cuddling. hint lots and lots. I am more of a cuddlier I like to cuddle a lot watch movies relate talk those kind of things which can lead to more sex but that must not be the goal point. I have found in my time that older men are more keen to the connection and talking more aspect of a relationship because they are more seasoned than some young men. If you was dating I was seriously consider dating an older man not too old but older more seasoned than myself. I can't stand immaturity in a man it just rubs me all the wrong way. I love compassion, thoughtfulness, and care in a man and he MUST love JESUS be walking with him and have his own relationship with GOD not trying to get one with GOD through me. I crave need want that emotional connection it means so much to me. In certain aspects it opens all kinds of avenues to intimacy for me. It can even make the sex better being that I would then be more willing and wanting to have sex with you because I feel connected and much closer to you than just sexually. A lot of men can't seem to grasp this concept because they are not taking the time to seek research and learn what a emotional connection is and just how vital and important it is to a woman. I question myself a lot asking is something wrong with me? because I like be emotionally connected. I like when a man can hold a conversation is intellectual and inclined to things I say I need to be careful because if I have a hint of like for you I start thinking of you emotionally and wanting to talk to you more and the whole nine.

That's why it's important to know when you are venerable in those times it's best to stay cleat of men, some men can smell it on you at least that's what I think because it's almost like some of them know just what to say and how to maneuver themselves to the point you are pouring you heart out to them about how hurt you are what's on your mind what you want, miss, like, and need next thing you know your sharing you fears, hopes, and dreams with this man. Next thing you know you start picturing you future with him then thinking what it would be like to be married to him and the whole nine. I don't want to be an emotional slut, I don't want to be a slut anything. This is why I am seeking christian counseling and I am determine to work on my issue and better myself in  Christ because I want to be all the woman he made me to be nothing less. Just my stupid fears get in the way sometimes and I get set backs. But I shall overcome I can't give up hope not when JESUS is coming back. I also think part of why I crave this a great deal is because I did not grow up with my dad so I think this plays a part in it, Not that is strange or unheard of that women like to connect because we do more than anything we as women want to connect we want connection with our life long mate. Something bonded and strong that will stand the test of time we want to be closer to you more than any other at least that's how I would want it. I like the tight knit bond no one can come between us type love. Which takes GOD prayer and work nothing like that happens over night of this  I am sure. Am I an emotional slut? Sometimes I wonder I don't want to be but in order to not be I must keep GOD in my life my business my everything at all times. I can't do this life with out GOD.

As ladies we need to be careful with our emotions. We need to guard our hearts with all diligence. Stay inclined to God so that way no dude can run game on you. Because they be trying Christian or not and sometimes the Christian ones be the worse ones sad but true this is why we must stay inclined with GOD. I will end in saying I must work my issues out with the help of continued Christian Counselor and my LORD and Saviour Jesus Christ to whom I love and am so thankful for Amen.

Written By: Mireille Robinson Mathis